A gay man has taken to internet giant Reddit to publish a letter he received from his father that disowned him for being gay.
James, who received the letter, says, “In August of 2007, I finally built up the courage to tell my father I was gay. The moment I said it, the phone got quiet and he got off the phone after a few okays. I decided to give him time to process the news. About a week later, and not long before my birthday, I received the following letter:
“James: This is a difficult but necessary letter to write. I hope your telephone call was not to receive my blessing for the degrading of your lifestyle. I have fond memories of our times together, but that is all in the past.
Don’t expect any further conversations with me. No communications at all. I will not come to visit, nor do I want you in my house.
You’ve made your choice though wrong it may be. God did not intend for this unnatural lifestyle.
If you choose not to attend my funeral, my friends and family will understand.
Have a good birthday and good life. No present exchanges will be accepted.
Goodbye, Dad.”
James says, “I’ve never done drugs, was an excellent student, an obedient child (far less trouble than many of my classmates), didn’t drink until I was 22 because it terrified me, and have had just 1 speeding ticket in my life. Yet I am still seemingly deserving of this terrible act of hate and cowardice that one person can place on another. 5 years on and I am still doing fine, though this letter saunters into my mind every once in a while. When it does, I say without hesitation: Fuck you, Dad.”
The post has received a huge amount of attention on the site, which has led James to say, “5 years later, I’m fine, please pass your acceptance and love to the people you personally know who are going through this type of persecution and harm from their blindly religious parents/guardians.”
You can see an image of the letter HERE.




I am so sorry you lost your father due to his fear/ignorance/intolerance. There is a whole generation, however, for which ACCEPTANCE is a no-no. I would like to believe he still loves and thinks of you often. I am saddened that your reaction would be FUCK YOU DAD, BUT I completely understand. At what point in our lives do we choose to be straight? Well, it is the same for gay, lesbian and transgender. As a mother of two, I would NEVER disown my children because of their gender/sexual identity. They are ME, my heart and soul. They are not a reflection of me, they are a PART of me and I would die for them. You sound like a wonderful child and, as for your father, I am ashamed of his behavior. I grew up in a household like your dad’s, and I do not know how we ended up open minded or whatever, but let’s consider ourselves lucky to no be them <3 Best of everything!
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So sorry.
God is loving and knew EVERYTHING about us before we were even born.
God/Jesus or The Bible is a poor excuse to spew hate.
I hope you have a WONDERFUL life and your family comes around one day.
@loh@, Brina
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This is just another example of homophobia and ignorance. Its so sad that this guy had to lose his family because his dad couldn’t get over himself enough to accept it. I’m a gay male and my parents took some time but they accepted it and they still love me. I just don’t understand why people can be like this. Homosexuality won’t go away so people better learn to accept it. I’m sorry that your father is an ignorant **** and i hope you have a happy life
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